Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize