What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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