Your mouth is God's brothel.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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