I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize