I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
