You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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