we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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