this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
He felt like a one man threesome
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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