does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Randomize
