I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
MIDGETS
????
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
