just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
No...this little piggys going to the bar
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
