I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Your cock deserves a montage
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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