I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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