That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
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