All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
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