Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
this hospital has no fireball
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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