Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
23 People Confess The Trashiest Thing They’ve Seen In Person
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
19 Transgender People Reveal The First Sign That They Were Trans
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.