My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
