As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
