Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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