Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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