home. puking in laundry basket.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
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