is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
