So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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