so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
