He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
