so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
