Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I wear drunk well.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
