Welp...herpes.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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