Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
