if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
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