You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
