Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
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he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
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Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
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