I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
40s are totally the cure
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
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