im gay
i know
yea but for you.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
