it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
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Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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