Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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