foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
