I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
