With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i came on her dog
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
They took my balls.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
