I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
