That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Randomize