it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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