Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
