"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he was CRYING into my vagina
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
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I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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