i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
