did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
