would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
