I want to have your abortion
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
