You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
